I thought I will not make it. Alhamdulillah I have passed that threshold in life at 12.01 am today. I am now a 60-year old young man. I was worried when I read the news recently on the untimely death of an actor, Raffi [ famous for his role in AZURA about 2 decades ago]. Never came at the most critical time, just one day before his birthday! He was still in his forties. Now, Allah has let me pass the border of this golden age. This is the best gift a humble human being would expect.
Happy birthday to me, no celebration though, but lots and lots of gratitude for being alive and kicking. I almost could not make it a few weeks before my 55th birthday in 2003. I was still working in London then. I suffered a terrible pain and an uneasiness a month before I was very sick and was not able move around with ease. I was referred to a specialist, Mr Ackle who quicly identified the ailment - a fistula at the lower abdomen about the size of a tennis ball which was bursting. My blood sugar went high, although I was not a diabetic then. I was immediately sent to the operation theater and operated upon.
Mr Ackle told my wife that if it has not been identified within a week, I would have to say goodbye to this world. Alhamdulillah, my life was spared and I was able to celebrate my 55th birthday then. Thereon I will always say thank you God without fail each time I wake up from my sleep.
My birthday wish is to be able to reach that golden age that my father had reached before he was called upon... at 86! If Allah were to fulfill my wish, I can still contribute in a little way that I can, to the sustainability of this world by continually being an academic preaching on this area that is so imperative.
As I stated in "My Way" [my first tell tale in this blog], the itch to go to places beyond the shores of Malaysia is still there. I am looking forward to an offer to teach at a university in London soon, very soon.
You see I have a dream to be distinct in whatever I do - as an academic, a professional building engineer, an artist, a musician, a writer and a poet... InsyaAllah if I can celebrate many more birthdays to come, with Allah's blessing, I will be able to make my dream a reality before I am being called upon. I want to make my children and grandchildren and my great grandchildren and... feel proud of my achievement and hopefully they will achieve better than what I have managed to achieve.
I am proud of my grandpa's achievement during his lifetime. He is Mr PM Ibrahim or simply Pak Brahim. Those in the sixties and beyond would remember him. He taught English at the Sultan Abdul Hamid College during his younger days in 1920s and went on to become the first headmaster of Derma English School in Kangar in early 1950s. He was an accomplished hypnotist and a musician [he played the clarinet] as well.
Of course I am proud of my father, Pak Noq, too. Although he didn't do well in his studies and job, he was a violinist of a special kind. He was capable of reading musical scores/notes and composing music. He fiddled his violin like what Idris Sardi is capable of doing now. Melancholic and at times with eerie sound. His favourite song was "La Composita". I used to accompany him on my guitar then. He told me that he learned to play the violin differently from others from a professional German violinist who visited Kedah then. A great achievement those days.
Alhamdullilah and happy birthday to me. Of course my loving wife wished me earlier and my 3 children who are in London did just that via "Skype" 2 hours' ago... some technology! Wish they are here with me, but apakan daya...sabar anak-anak ku, jika diizinkan Allah, abah dan mak will be there with you soon, insyaAllah.
THANK YOU GOD